A brief histoory Part 1

Greetings well i thought i would give a brief history of myself and how this blog came to be. My name is Nicholas Michael Manning and i moved to Seattle Wa 4 years ago. It will be 5 years in January. I moved here following my fathers suicide at age 17 from Az i thought that a change of location was in order. Since before my fathers death i had always struggled with suicidal ideation and my fathers death only made matters worse. My mother divorced my father when i was 12 years old and i have not seen her since. My first few years here were uneventful. It was not untill January 2008 that my life began to seriously go off course. My moods began to swing wildly out of control i was either feeling a euphoric or i was severely depressed and my mood could change in a matter of minutes. It was like being on a roller coaster ride that i couldnt get off of. In March of 2008 my condition continued to get worse and i began having hallucinations and hearing voices tellingt me to kill myself and that it was the only way out. At this time i had a fairly large circle of friends however as my condition became worse and moods and behavior became more erratic they abandoned me which i completely understood but it hurt deeply none the less. In April 2008 i was on facebook i came across a profile of a guy named Eric Wheeler and on his profile he talked about God. I sent him a message out of curiosity to ask him about god and about questions i had. At this point i had decided that killing myself was indeed my only option but i was afraid of going to hell. Eric and i began to converse through Facebook and he told me about his beliefs. It finally got to a point where he wanted to meet in person. He was attending a college in Bellingham Wa and he wanted me to come up for the weekend. I was very hesitant to do so simply because i didnt know him and was afraid he wouldnt really like me at all after meeting me but in the end my curiosity about him got the best of me and i headed up to meet him. It was one of the best decisions i have ever made. Eric made me feel at home from the moment i arrived and greeted me with a big smile and an even bigger hug!! He introduced to all his friends and i observed that these people had something that i wanted. That first weekend while i was there i accepted christ as my savior and Eric Baptized me in Lake Padden on April 26th 2008 surrounded by new friends whom i now considered my family i began my new journey of finding out all i could about God. I foolishly believed things would start to turn around after my conversion to Christianity but that was not to be the case as i was about to discover.